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What do you think of the start of my book?
okay sooo… this is like just the start..tell me what you think! It’s called “Belleza Armoi: A Tale of Perfection”______________________________________________________________________________I sat upright in the antique china tub, holding one of my perfect, long legs in front of me, scrubbing it with the fluffy washer. When I was satisfied with its perfection I put it down and gracefully got out of the bathtub, snagging my expensive silk robe on the way up. Not bothering to tie my robe, I strutted down the hallway lined with paintings of naked Italian models to my room. The curtains were wide open and the windows were ajar, a breeze blowing the loose curls of my blonde hair, but I didn’t bother to close either; what a treat for onlooking neighbours! Slipping off the skimpy silk, I made my way to the massive mirrored wardrobe and opened the doors. Looking for something to wear I shifted through all the beautiful outfits with six-zero price tags on them, most of the clothes I had never worn more than once; it’s a one time wear policy with me.I know; it’s a waste “there are homeless people starving all over America”, blah blah blah. But really, I don’t care one bit. This is my life, and I’m loving it. Breaking out of my haze I glanced at the dress I was holding; black chiffon with a deep V-neck to the belly button, tightly hugging my curves to mid-calf. Topped with silver-buckled black stiletto boots, this dress would be perfect. Easing it over my head and adding a silver chain with a beautiful heart pendant, I stood up. I slipped on my boots, having no trouble with the quality zips. Closing the cupboard door, I finally checked out my image. I smiled happily to myself; anyone who saw me (male or female) would almost fall over in shock of my beauty. Grabbing my black Chanel handbag, I headed French antique desk for the door. “Belleza? Is that you dear? Come on, no skipping breakfast.” Her mother’s voice sounded from the kitchen.”Mom, I-”"Belleza Armoi, you will eat something and you will eat it now!” Elenore Armoi yelled.Fine, I thought, might as well keep it cool; and strutted off to the kitchen to grab a croissant. After my quick breakfast I hurried to the white limousine parked out the front of the family mansion and slid in through the door held open by a chauffeur. I pulled out my phone and flipped through the messages. When I was bored of that I pulled out my nail file and worked on my already perfect nails, tracing the French tips.”Ah. Miss Armoi, we are here.” Mr. Chauffeur’s voice cut in. Taking the driver’s arm I gracefully got out of the limo and looked around. When I was sure everyone’s eyes were on me I started up the stairs to the golden archway that marked the foyer of Brimley Academy. Classmates started to rush up to me, saying hello and wishing me well. I smiled back at them; that was all the attention they were going to get from the lovely Belleza Armoi. Breaking past the crowd, I pranced up the rest of the stairs and through the big golden arch, only stopping when I reached the desk smack bang in the middle of the circular room. “Hello there, my timetable please.” I said to lady at the counter. The woman just stared at me. This made me smile; she was obviously mesmerized by my voice and good looks, but I felt like being a bitch. Turning a scowl on her I said, “Urm, excuse me. I know I’m pretty but you’re keeping me waiting, and besides; it’s rude to stare.”"Oh, um,” the starer said, “so sorry, what was your name dear?”"Belleza Armoi.”"Here you are.” She said simply and handed me a timetable printed on a plain A4 sheet of paper, a smile upon her face. With that I turned my back, my hair (which I wore down) shaking all over the place. I glanced at my timetable and found that I had Math: Trigonometry up first, one of the easiest Math genres and lucky for me; I had a male teacher. Male teachers always meant no homework for ‘Miss Armoi’. I made my way to the room, class wasn’t due to start for another seven minutes but I had a good feeling about getting in early. I said hello to Mr Harney and took a seat at the front of the room, everyone would have to look at me there. Pulling out my phone I flipped through my contacts, stopping when I got to the name Kelsi Bernard. Her phone went straight through to Voicemail so I left a message.”Hey Kels. Looks like you let your phone run flat; again! But anyways, just got my timetable so I’m hoping your classes are the same as mine. I’ve got Trig first, starting soon too. So, yeah. Charge your cellphone! See ya at lunch. Mwah!”Sighing I looked up at the circular clock on the wall, 8:58 am. Two more minutes and class will start. Pulling out my compact mirror I checked my hair, fussing over parts that had done crazy flips all over the place. I put away the mirror and glanced at the door and; oh my god. A was a boy there. A boy I had never before seen in my life. He was perfect, from height to curvature of his rosy lips.lily: thanks for the comment
i think i should make the start more interesting (although it DOES get more interesting further on..).melissa: yes, i see. thanks for the kind remarks and i am going to re-write some parts and make it more interesting.. lol. i actually wrote this on the holidays (like 9 weeks ago) and am kinda bored of it now so i’m gonna write something more interesting… also the word ‘Belleza’ means beauty in spanish and i thought ‘Armoi’ sounded posh lol.just for the record, the guy (dane) is not a ghost. but he is playing Belleza…hes like got a girlfriend and stuff..
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