Beneficial Problem Solver For Pedestal Partners Desk

5 November 2010

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Does my mother in law hate me? Or am I being paranoid?
I don’t live close to my MIL, so have never had a chance to develop a real relationship, but we always seemed to get along ok. I had a baby boy at the beginning of the year, which she was thrilled at. She was absolutely fine with me until I took the baby up to see her when picking up my husband from a course that was up her way. On this occasion when we went to go home she didn’t even say goodbye to me, just kissed my son and husband and then slammed the door in my face! The next time we went up to see her she didn’t serve me dinner until they had finished theirs as she assumed I would be feeding the baby (who didn’t need feeding!), and when I did get dinner it was a 1/2 portions, and the same for breakfast the following day!I recently got married to my partner, and she insisted that we shouldn’t invite all the family that were invited to my partner’s sister’s wedding. I thought this was odd as my partner should invite whoever he wanted there. My partner only had 4 family members at the wedding and a handful of friends – which i was quite sad about. On the wedding day she refused to have my son Pedestal Partners desk the night of the wedding as she wanted to be able to have at least one drink, however she went to bed at 8pm. This meant that my parents (who had paid for it all) had to stay with my son and they couldn’t have a drink or stay up too late to see family that they hadn’t seen for ages. I thought it was extremely selfish.To top matters off she gave my husbands sister £5K for her wedding and a contribution to her honeymoon, and we got £250 towards a wedding cake and no present – and the card just said “from mum and mike” no kisses or anything!This year I also didn’t get a birthday present or card – but my sister in law’s husband got a £100 meal at Claridges!My husband is now away in afghanistan and she wants to come to see our new house and my son before Christmas. For xmas she has bought my son something he already has. Instead of taking it back to the store, or exchanging it she said she is keeping it for him, bringing it down for him to play with, and then she will take it back to her house so that my sister in law’s baby to play with when he/she arrives. My son can apparently play with it when he goes there (4/5 times a year!). When she comes to see us she is staying in a hotel, and has requested that my son stay with them the three nights they are staying. It seems to me like she’s saying “I want your son, but I don’t want you!” to me! I have tried to explain to my husband how I feel, but he just says that she is shy, and that she likes to have my son on her own cos she doesn’t get to spend much time with him. I know I am annoyed about how she puts my husband’s sister on a pedestal, and she gives her ALOT more than we ever get, but am I really being paranoid or have I got cause for concern?Reassurance required!!Sandy K – she doesn’t want my husband to stay with her in the hotel ( as he is away in Afghanstan), she wants my son to stay with her.Thanks for your advice though – made me laugh!Dickie B – Bit harsh! I am slimmer now than I have ever been, so can’t be that.I know I have flaws, like everyone, but I have always been polite, kind and respectful when staying with her. I am well mannered and I am a good mother. I have not said or done anything nasty to her. I also know my husband would never slag me off to her. Hence I am curious to know what it is.Thanks for the reply though.
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